I'm 32, a dad, and I am not a douchebag...

With each passing day I grow more and more frustrated with how dads are portrayed in society.  Now, could make some heavy statement about how dads are being held down by the man.  Or, how as dads we are a much maligned group of people deserving a chance to stand side-by-side equally with the mothers of our children.  I could say a lot of things, but the truth is some of us are douche bags.

All I will ask is that you readers and the rest of society who may never actually read this: Please give us a shot...Don't ignore us in children's literature; Don't constantly make us the butt of every parenting joke; Don't assume we're just idiots plodding along pretending we know what we're doing (yeah we probably don't know what we're doing, but most of us try, and we try hard).

For the dads, this is going to take some effort.  There are a few of you out there that are giving us a bad name.  If you fall into any of the three following categories please pull yourself together and try to set a better example:

1. Horrified Diaper Changing Dad-  Listen, everyone poops.  At some point you are going to have to change a messy diaper, and it will smell terrible.  But the moment you feel you need to put a mask on to protect you from that diaper you've already lost.  Worse yet, when you heave or actually throw up, the top of the dad ladder sinks just a few more feet.  The stink of that diaper is nothing compared to the stink of cowardice wafting off of you every time you hesitate to change that diaper.  Get in there and quit complaining already.  Face it, Your poop doesn't smell like roses. 
   

Sleep in Saturdays, the greatest idea ever!

I started this blog as a place to vent. It is a place where I can come and talk about what it's like to be a parent. But somewhere along the way I didn't really account for the time it would take to actually parent, go to work, spend time with my wife, sleep, eat, occasionally shower, and any number of other things that steal my time now that I am a new parent.

That said, I haven't had the time to really put effort into this blog. I had high hopes and have fallen short of my goals...That is a little disappointing, but when I take a step back and think of every time I've seen my daughter smile at me in the last couple of months I don't even care. No matter how bad or stressful my work day is, I know that when I get home to my wife and baby girl nothing else matters. So I am going to try to resurrect this blog, but I won't do it at the expense of my family time.

I'm sure at this point you're wondering what has been going on since my last post. I know you're constantly checking the site, waiting for what I have to say next or wondering if you'll ever hear from me again. Have no fear. There is finally something new to add.

My wife recently came up with the greatest idea ever. It's called 'Sleep in Saturdays,' (or Sundays depending on our plans). The idea is this: My wife and I will take turns sleeping in on Saturday. It's that simple, when it's my turn to sleep in, my wife will get up with the baby, feed her, dress her, and take her out for a couple of hours. When it's my turn I'll get up prepare a bottle, try to dress her, and take her out for a couple of hours.

It really is a sanity booster. By the end of the week, we're both pretty beat and the opportunity to sleep in recharges all of those exhausted internal batteries. Not only that, but when it's my turn to get up with the baby I get the added benefit of daddy-daughter time that i usually miss during the week.

If you don't have a rule like this in your house I strongly suggest you give it a shot. My wife is brilliant. It's ideas like these that deserve Nobel prizes not silly advances in atomic physics or penning an obscure book no one has ever heard of.

What not to do...in 5 simple steps.

It's funny how many people want to give you advice before the baby is born, but then after the baby is born you're on your own. All those people that lined up to congratulate you disappear in those first few weeks to "let you get settled." That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. After 5 weeks, I've come to realize that we'll never truly be 'settled' again.

So, for all of those people still waiting to get settled here are 10 random things you should know in those first few weeks.

5. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Poop sprays. Everyone will have you worried about your little baby boy peeing all over the place, but don't underestimate the power of poo (boy or girl). Never, and I mean never remove a diaper without having a replacement within arms reach.

4. You do not need the following items immediately: Swings of any sort, umbrella strollers, high chairs, gates, a electrical socket protectors. Sure it may help to have these things done, but until your baby is holding his/her head up or crawling on their own none of these things matter. I've spent more time pulling out the socket protectors to plug things in than I spent putting them all over the house. Don't let anyone pressure you into rushing to get things done before the baby comes.

3. Cloth diapers are a good idea in theory, but if your little bundle is having issues or is (like ours) what you doctor calls a high maintenance baby or HMB, take each battle as it comes. Maybe down the line you can convert to cloth, but right from the start in the heat of battle it's not the way to go. We're ready to try ours whenever she's ready.

2. Playtime. In the early weeks, playtime is for the parents. We want our babies to be uber-special and ahead f every curve, but in the end they are just happy to be fed cleaned and well rested. Yeah, we lay them on their mats and take cute pictures (or if you are me hundreds of cute pictures), but just keep them comfortable. That's all they really need.

1. Sleep is more important for you in the first few weeks than it is the baby. Trust me, the baby will sleep, but it is hard for parents to just lay down whenever the baby is napping. When the baby sleeps you'll want to straighten up the house, cook a real meal, catch up on your favorite DVR'd television shows, but don't. Don't be a hero....SLEEP. Everyone in the house will be happier if you're well rested.

These are my latest tips on parenting...It may not be much, but these were hard lessons for us in the first 5 weeks.